Public Evenly Divided On Washington Football Team Name

Public opinion regarding the controversial name of the Washington NFL team is evenly split between those who object to the moniker and those who do not object, according to a poll jointly conducted by Salem University and the Phonyon, America’s Goodest News Source.

Opinion evenly divided

Opinion evenly divided

The survey asked 938 respondents to rate their level of objection to the team’s nickname, which is considered by some to be an ethnic slur towards Native Americans. Participants rated their opinions on a sliding scale of objection, ranging from highly objectionable or somewhat objectionable to not objectionable or awesome.

An in-depth analysis of the data shows that opinions tend to be divided along racial lines, with whites tending to find the name less objectionable than non-whites.

Opinion Details by group

Opinion Details by group

According to lead pollster Dr. LaKeisha McCoy-Sanders of Salem University, “When we started looking at the data according to people’s self-reported racial or ethnic identity, it emerged that there was a distinct tendency among participants to respond based upon the geographic origin of their ancestry”.

As part of the survey, several poll participants agreed to be interviewed to offer additional insights into their responses and thought processes. Among other observations, a substantial number of the respondents expressed amazement with how articulate McCoy-Sanders was during the course of their interactions.

“I bloody well don’t see a problem wit’ it”, reported drunken Mick Seamus O’Herlihy, as he guzzled whiskey from a flask and continually interrupted the interview to engage in fistfights.

“What, what do I know from football? What’s in a name?”, local Heeb Moshe Abromowitz asked rhetorically while departing a restaurant without tipping.

“Whoa, whoa, it don’t mean nothin’, forget about it”, advised swarthy Wop Angelo Crocetti, just prior to assaulting a local businessman who reportedly owed he and his associates money.

“Mademoiselle, I do not want any trouble,  I surrender unconditionally”, quivering Frog Pierre Leclerc offered nervously yet haughtily, an invisible, putrid cloud of body odor bringing tears to the eyes of those in his proximity.

While society remains highly polarized with respect to the Washington football team’s sobriquet, opinion on other potentially troublesome team names ranges from largely indifferent to nearly unanimous approval.

For example,  the public appears almost completely unconcerned by the oxymoronic Utah Jazz, save for a few self-identified “ironicists” who unfailingly point out the inherent contradiction at parties. Conversely, public opinion is almost unanimous in support of the proposed renaming of the Milwaukee Brewers to the Milwaukee Polacks.


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