Public opinion regarding the controversial name of the Washington NFL team is evenly split between those who object to the moniker and those who do not object, according to a poll jointly conducted by Salem University and the Phonyon, America’s Goodest News Source. Continue reading
Incoherent Man Struggles In Vain To Express Simplest Thoughts
Team Pronounced Defeated At 9:55 PM EST
In a career plagued by years of uneven results and dubious accomplishments, former Milwaukee Brewers manager and 43rd President of the United States George W. Bush has led the resurgent Kansas City Royals to their best season in years.
Bush, 67, who manages under the pseudonym “Ned Yost”, employed his trademark “manage-from-the-gut” leadership style to motivate the underdog team, which includes a mixture of blossoming young talents such as Eric Hosmer and Salvador Perez, veterans Alex Gordon and Billy Butler, and the stabilizing presence of a key off-season acquisition, pitcher James “Big Game James” Shields.
Embattled New York Yankee’s slugger Alex Rodriguez has been victimized by an elaborate smear campaign targeting his deeply-held religious convictions, according to a source within the Rodriguez camp who spoke under condition of anonymity.
The “A-Rod” confidant reports that the superstar’s latest association with PEDs (Performance Enhancing Drugs) was leaked to the press in January 2013 by the owner of the implicated Biogenesis clinic, Anthony Bosch, who the source alleges is a senior leader of Al-Qaeda. Continue reading